Good dialogue is a pleasure to read. However, writing dialogue is not always a pleasure to create. As with any difficult task, sometimes we make mistakes.
Fortunately for you, I make mistakes all the time. So here are three mistakes I’ve made when writing dialogue, along with some thoughts on how to avoid them. Hope you can learn something from it!
1. Overdoing Voice
Conventional wisdom states that every character should have a unique voice. While this is true, sometimes we writers make the mistake of taking this tip too far. For instance, I remember writing a character whose every other line ended with the word “chief.” Some examples:
“You gonna finish that, chief?”
“That’s it, chief, go that way.”
“Chief, you better listen to me. I’m about to lose it.”
Don’t worry, I’m laughing at it, too. Unintentional comedy is often the funniest kind.
Anyway, we definitely want our characters to have unique voices. But we also want them to sound like real people, not repetitive weirdos. Some writers overpack their characters’ dialogue with “ums” and “you knows.” Others overdo accents, turning every “your” into “yer” and every “isn’t” into “ain’t.” To be clear, I’m not calling these techniques useless. Let’s just remember that a little goes a long way.
Of note: I think it’s useful to exaggerate dialogue in early drafts. Doing so oftentimes helps us get a strong grasp of the character. In the first draft, put in as many “chiefs” as you like. Just don’t forget to scale it back to a reasonable level.
2. Being Expository
“I’m feeling so conflicted right now,” said Solara. “I could get the vanilla, but I really like chocolate. I only have enough for one scoop. Such a dilemma!”
This dialogue is just as bad as the guy who says chief all the time—maybe worse. Dialogue is at its best when it’s subtle rather than heavy-handed. When characters state exactly what they think, it feels inauthentic. People rarely say exactly what’s on their minds. Rather, they more often hint at it through subtext.
When I feel like my dialogue is too expository, I often define the information I’m trying to impart, then decide how to show that information without stating it. In the above example, Solara might instead ask her friends, “Have you had the vanilla here before?” Or maybe she asks for sample of both flavors, thinks a moment then says, “Wait. Sorry. Can I try them one more time? Please?” There are plenty of ways to show that the character’s conflicted without injecting that exact message into our dialogue.
3. Relying Too Heavily on Dialogue
I studied screenwriting in college. Afterward, I switched over to prose. I’ve stayed there ever since. The funny thing is, sometimes you might read my manuscripts and think you’re reading a movie script. Sometimes I get into a mode where my scenes are all dialogue and no description.
If you’re writing prose, using too much dialogue is like buying a tool kit and only using the hammer. The novel form grants us access to the authorial voice, so we should use it. If we try to develop everything with dialogue (character, backstory, plot, setting, conflict), we run the risk of committing mistake number two.
Of course, there are exceptions. Dave Eggers’s Your Fathers, Where Are They? And the Prophets, Do They Live Forever? is a novel written entirely as dialogue. But this is an outlier. And let’s not forget that it was written by a guy who wrote seven other novels.
For those writing prose, dialogue is a tasty steak—but only when seasoned correctly. Think of non-dialogue sentences as your spices.
In Conclusion
Yes, writing dialogue is sometimes a pain. But that only means it’s a worthwhile pursuit. Let’s avoid these mistakes. Let’s stay determined. And please, let’s not write any characters who call people “chief.” Sorry for that.
Kyle A. Massa is a speculative fiction author living somewhere in upstate New York with his fiancee and their two cats. His stories have appeared in numerous online magazines, including Allegory, Chantwood, and Dark Fire Fiction.
