Tag: mother’s day

This Mother’s Day, Meet the Moms of “Eggs for the Ageless”

Hey reader, Happy Mother’s Day!

Today, I’d like to introduce you to the moms from my upcoming book, Eggs for the Ageless. They may not have Mother’s Day where they’re from, but we’ll celebrate nonetheless. Here we go!

Sarene, Traveling Holy Devoted

Sarene is our main character Egg’s mother. She’s a Holy Devoted of the Ageless, which is similar to a nun. She’s super into it.

In fact, Sarene’s zeal for religion drives a wedge between herself and her daughter. Their conflict mirrors the overarching conflict in the novel itself.

What does Sarene look like? Let’s take it from the text:

She was stern and severe with a heron’s build and differently colored eyes: one brown, one blue. Her head was shaven, revealing a smooth scalp with a halo of runic tattoos—12 of them, each representing one of the Dozen Gods and Goddesses.

And here are a few random quotes from Sarene that should give you a sense of her personality:

“Live your life as long as it lasts, Zeggara,” said her mother, passing the manuscript across the desk. She patted her daughter’s hand. “And do some good with the life you’re given.”

“Do you believe [your father is] truly gone, Zeggara?” [Sarene] seemed genuinely curious. “When a person dies, do you believe all that comes after is…nothingness?”

“I…I don’t know.” Egg wished she had a better answer.

“I don’t believe it. I refuse to believe it. So I chose to believe in the Ageless instead. I believe in another life, a happier one. I believe I’ll hug your father again. You will, too, after your Devotion.”

Sarene is one of the most dynamic characters in the novel, and therefore one of the most challenging to write. No spoilers, but she plays an antagonistic role in the first act, appears rarely in the second, then takes a leading role in the third. In basketball terms, she’s got a variable usage rate.

Fun fact: Sarene was absent from this story’s first draft. Only when I rewrote it two years ago did I create her, and I’m glad I did. She serves an essential role of generating religious tension for our main character.

Sturnella, Sadly Deceased

Sturnella is wife to Rulf (vicious tyrant) and mother to Rulf Junior (not-at-all-vicious heir to the empire). She’s already died when our story begins but, spoiler alert, she makes a brief cameo. Perhaps in a flashback, perhaps in a dream, or perhaps some other way. Hmm…

Anyhoo, enough cryptic clues. Here’s what Sturnella looks like:

[Sturnella] appeared to be about Egg’s mother’s age, though she had far more hair: Long auburn locks knotted into patterns a weaver might envy. Her dress was equally impressive, purple cloth and golden lace, with a fringe of hanging gems that chimed when she moved.

I won’t give away any more Sturnella quotes, lest I ruin the surprise. Here’s what I will say: Her name comes from a genus of “North American grassland birds called meadowlarks.” I found that on Wikipedia, so it must be true.

Giving Sturnella the proper presence was challenging. As mentioned, she only gets one scene, so I needed to make that scene memorable. Not sure I achieved that, so you’ll have to let me know.

Lira, Goddess of Order

If Lira was played by an actress, it would be Judi Dench. In other words, she’s a hardass. For example, here’s an exchange between her son, Rismo, and her son’s buddy, Trast:

“On a scale from one to 10,” Rismo asked aloud, “how mad is she going to be?”

“Knowing your mother,” Trast answered, “I think that scale’s too small.”

As you can see, Lira is not the most forgiving mom. Nor is she especially nurturing, understanding, or reassuring. However, she is efficient and meticulous, and she knows how to run a world. Just take this mini monologue:

“This is not the first world my soon-to-be-former husband and I founded. There was another, less successful world. One without rules and repercussions.”

“But Mother,” said Rismo. “You love rules and repercussions.”

“There’s a reason for that. This prototype world was your father’s idea. He wanted a land of boundless creation, a place where imagination and reality were one. All he wanted to do was create. ‘Let the chef cook’—I believe that’s the expression he used.

“But this world of Flor’s didn’t function. Without gravity to tether its people, they came unstuck from the ground and floated off into nowhere. Without time to mark their days, lives passed in the span of a sentence—or never ended. Without death, people suffered hunger and thirst and crippling old age, yet never found relief or rest. The prototype failed. Do you understand why?”

“Because Flor should’ve written from an outline?” Trast tried.

“Because creation needs order. Because every action causes a reaction. Because laws must be made and upheld.”

Well, at least now you can see why she’s such a stickler for the rules.

So there you have it. You’ve met the moms of Eggs for the Ageless. If you’d like to read more about them, feel free to buy the book, which releases eight days from today on May 16.

Finally, I’d like to wish a happy Mother’s Day to my mom, stepmom, mother-in-law, aunts, sister-in-law, cousins, and friends. And a special Mother’s Day wish goes to my wife, because this is her very first Mother’s Day as a mom. Enjoy your day, Sara!


Kyle A. Massa is a comic fantasy author living somewhere in upstate New York with his wife, their daughter, and three wild animals. His published works include two books and several short stories. When he’s not writing, he enjoys reading, running, and drinking coffee.

Crazy Mother’s Day

Having a hard time thinking of something to do for your mom on Mother’s Day? Think another lame card from Target just isn’t going to cut it this year? Well my friends, here are some ideas for Mother’s Day your mom will never forget!

Crazy Mother’s Day Idea #1 – Take Mom Skydiving

Defying death has never been so fun, and who better to do it with than your lovely mother? This will be an experience that neither of you will forget. You can make it even more interesting by taking bets on who will have a heart attack first. If you go this route, make sure you bring along the trusty old defibrillator.

Crazy Mother’s Day Idea #2 – Take Mom for a Joyride

Most people don’t know this, but a lot of moms have a huge amount of repressed anger, and most of it’s directed at you. Remember that time you didn’t do your science project, and then mom had to do it for you at midnight? Or the time you left your dirty socks on the floor and mom had to pick them up? It’s these kinds of things that make moms so angry. So on Mother’s Day, put your mom behind the wheel of a car and let her drive one-twenty down the freeway. You could even bring a baseball bat to a residential neighborhood and have mom whack a few mailboxes while you’re at it. If you get pulled over, just remind the officer that it’s Mother’s Day. If he has a mom, he’ll understand.

Crazy Mother’s Day Idea #3 – Blow Something Up with Mom

What could be more fun? There’s nothing like a nice big explosion to bring a family together. I would start small, with a garden gnome or something, then work your way up. Maybe by the end you could blow up mom’s boss’s house. Now that’s a Mother’s Day gift I’m sure she’d appreciate.

In all seriousness, I wish every mom out there a happy Mother’s Day. I encourage everyone to do something with their moms, whether it’s something crazy or something relaxing. And to my mom – the best mom in the world – I love you, and happy Crazy Mother’s Day!

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